F.O.R.D Crest Ye Olde Brew News F.E.R.A. Crest
December 2001 Fermental Order of Renaissance Draughtsmen Volume 9 Number 12
In this issue:

December's Meeting

The next meeting will be held back at the Little Dublin Sports Pub (formerly Sisko's) in Taylor on Tuesday, December 11. Sisko's is located on Monroe (between Telegraph and Southfield), just south of Vanborn. Their address is 5855 Monroe and their phone number is 313-278-5340. . All styles are welcome for the December competition. Traditionally, December is the month for Barley Wines and Holiday Ales. As usual, the thirsty hard-core who want dinner will start arriving around 5PM, people will drift in for an hour or so, and we will start our meeting around 6PM.


Competition Results


Howard Klix

The winner from the Pale Ale Competition is:

Pale Ale Competition
Place Name Style Points
1 Chris Frey 6a American Pale Ale 44/50
2 Chris Frey 7 India Pale Ale 41.6/50
3 Chris Frey 7 India Pale Ale 40.6/50
HM Chris Frey 6a American Pale Ale 40/50
HM Chris Frey 6a American Pale Ale 38.6/50

This month's competition will be open to all style, As previously mentioned all beers are welcome. Barleywines, winter warmers and spice beers usually show up at this event. Here are a few suggestions.

11. ENGLISH AND SCOTTISH STRONG ALE

11A. Old Ale

Aroma: Malty, with complex fruity esters. Some oxidative notes are acceptable, akin to those found in port or sherry. Hop aromas not usually present, due to extended age.

Appearance: Medium amber to very dark red-amber color.

Flavor: Malty and usually sweet, with abundant fruity esters. The nutty malt sweetness yields to a finish that may vary from dry to somewhat sweet. Extended aging may contribute oxidative flavors similar to a fine old port or Madiera wine. Alcoholic strength should be evident, though not overwhelming.

Mouthfeel: Medium to full body; alcohol should contribute some warmth.

Overall Impression: An ale of significant alcoholic strength, though usually not as strong or rich as barleywine. Usually tilted toward a sweeter, more malty balance.

History/Comments: Often regarded as winter warmers, and often released as seasonal beers.

Ingredients: Generous quantities of well-modified pale malt (generally English in origin, though not necessarily so), along with judicious quantities of caramel malts. Some darker examples suggest that dark malts may be appropriate, though sparingly so as to avoid roast character. Adjuncts (such as molasses or dark sugar) may also be utilized. Hop variety is not as important, as the relative balance and aging process negate much of the varietal character.

Vital Statistics:                  OG: 1.060-1.090+

IBUs: 30-60                         FG: 1.015-1.022+

SRM: 12-16                      ABV: 6-9+%

Commercial Examples: Theakston Old Peculier, Young's Winter Warmer, Marston Owd Roger.


11B. Strong Scotch Ale (Wee Heavy)

Aroma: Deeply malty, with caramel apparent. Roasty or even smoky secondary aromas may also be present, adding complexity. Moderate diacetyl character is also acceptable.

Appearance: Dark amber to dark brown color, often with ruby highlights.

Flavor: Intensely malty with kettle caramelization apparent. Hint of roasted malt or smoky flavor may be present, as may some buttery diacetyl or nutty character.  Hop flavors are low, so malt impression should be dominant.

Mouthfeel: Full-bodied, with a thick, chewy viscosity. Alcoholic warmth should also be present.

Overall Impression: Rich and malty, reminiscent of a dessert. Complex secondary malt flavors prevent a one-dimensional impression.

History/Comments: Fermented at cooler temperatures than most ales, and with lower hopping rates, resulting in clean, intense malt flavors.  Well suited to the region of origin, with abundant malt and cool fermentation and aging temperature.  Hops, which are not native to Scotland and formerly expensive to import, were kept to a minimum.

Ingredients: Well-modified pale malt, with some crystal and perhaps a dash of darker malt or even roasted barley. A small proportion of smoked malt may add depth, though smoky character may also originate from the yeast. Hop presence is minimal, although English varieties are most authentic. Low-to-medium sulfate and medium carbonate/bicarbonate water is most appropriate.

Vital Statistics:                   OG: 1.072-1.088+

IBUs: 20-40                         FG: 1.019-1.025+

SRM: 10-47                      ABV: 6.9-8.5+

Commercial Examples: Traquair House, MacAndrew's Scotch Ale, McEwan's Scotch Ale, Belhaven Wee Heavy, Scotch du Silly, Vermont Pub and Brewery Wee Heavy.


12. BARLEYWINE AND IMPERIAL STOUT


12A. English-style Barleywine

Aroma: Moderate to intense fruitiness; presence of hops (English varieties) may range from mild to assertive. A caramel-like aroma is often present.

Appearance: Color may range from rich gold to very dark amber or even brown. Often has ruby highlights. May have low head retention.

Flavor: Fruity, with a great intensity of malt. Hop bitterness may range from just enough for balance to a firm presence; balance therefore ranges from malty to bitter. Some oxidative flavors may be present, and alcohol should be evident.

Mouthfeel: Full-bodied, with a slick, viscous texture.  Gentle smooth warmth from alcohol should be present.

Overall Impression: The richest and strongest of the English Ales.

History/Comments: Usually the strongest ale offered by a brewery, and often vintage-dated. Normally aged significantly prior to release. Often associated with the winter or holiday season.  Although a hoppy beer, the English Barleywine places less emphasis on hop character than the American Barleywine and features English hops.

Ingredients: Well-modified pale malt should form the backbone of the grist, with judicious amounts of caramel malts. Dark malts should be used with great restraint, if at all, as most of the color arises from a lengthy boil.  English hops such as Northdown, Target, East Kent Goldings and Fuggles.

Vital Statistics:                  OG: 1.080-1.120+

IBUs: 50-100                       FG: 1.020-1.030+

SRM: 10-22                      ABV: 8-12+%

Commercial Examples: Anchor Old Foghorn, Young's Old Nick, Fuller's Golden Pride.


12B. American-Style Barleywine

Aroma: Moderate to intense fruitiness; presence of hops (typical American varieties) may range from moderate to dominant. A caramel-like aroma is often present.

Appearance: Color may range from rich gold to very dark amber or even brown. Often has ruby highlights. May have low head retention.

Flavor: Fruity, with a great intensity of malt. Hop bitterness may range from just enough for balance to a firm, resiny dominance; balance therefore ranges from slightly malty to intensely bitter. Some oxidative flavors maybe present, and alcohol should be evident.

Mouthfeel: Full-bodied, with a slick, viscous texture.  Gentle smooth warmth from alcohol should be present.

Overall Impression: A well-hopped American interpretation of the richest and strongest of the English ales.

History/Comments: Usually the strongest ale offered by a brewery, and often vintage-dated. Normally aged significantly prior to release. Often associated with the winter or holiday season.   The American version of the Barleywine tends to have a greater emphasis on hop bitterness, flavor and aroma than the English Barleywine, featuring American hop varieties.

Ingredients: Well-modified pale malt should form the backbone of the grist, with judicious amounts of caramel malts. Dark malts should be used with great restraint, if at all, as most of the color arises from a lengthy boil.   American hops such as Cascades and Centennial.

Vital Statistics:                  OG: 1.080-1.120+

IBUs: 50-100                       FG: 1.020-1.030+

SRM: 10-22                      ABV: 8-12+%

Commercial Examples: Sierra Nevada Bigfoot, Rogue Old Crustacean, Victory Old Horizontal.


12C. Russian Imperial Stout

Aroma: Fruity esters, reminiscent of dark fruit, merged with intense roastiness and maltiness. Hop aroma is usually also present.

Appearance: Very dark reddish-black color; opaque.

Flavor: Intensely fruity and malty, backed up by balancing roastiness and prominent hop bitterness and flavor. A "burnt currant" character may be present, along with a suggestion of cocoa or strong coffee. Alcoholic strength should be evident, along with a deep, complex malt flavor. The finish can vary from relatively dry to moderately sweet, usually with some lingering roastiness and warming character.

Mouthfeel: Very full-bodied and rich, with intense flavors and perceptible alcohol presence. Carbonation is relatively low.

Overall Impression: An intensely flavorful beer. Roasty, fruity, and bittersweet, with a notable alcohol presence. Dark fruit melds with roasty, burnt, almost tar-like sensations.

History: Said to be popular with the Russian Imperial Court.

Comments: Brewed to high gravity and hopping level in England for export to the Baltic States and Russia.

Ingredients: Well-modified pale malt, with generous quantities of roasted grain. Flavor and aroma hops should include English varieties for authenticity. Alkaline water would balance the abundance of acidic roasted grain in the grist.

21. FRUIT BEER

Aroma: The character of the particular fruit(s) should be distinctive in the aroma.  Overall the aroma should be a balanced combination of malt, hops and the featured fruit(s) as appropriate to the specific type of beer being presented. If the base beer is an ale then general fruitiness and other fermentation byproducts such as diacetyl may be present as appropriate for the warmer fermentation.  If the base beer is a lager, then overall less fermentation byproducts would be appropriate. Some malt aroma preferable, especially in dark styles; hop aroma absent or balanced with fruit, depending on the style.  The overall aroma should be balanced and harmonious.

Appearance: Appearance should be appropriate to the base beer being presented and will vary depending on the base beer.  For lighter beers with fruits that exhibit distinctive colors, the color should be noticeable.

Flavor: The character of the particular fruit(s) should be distinctive in the flavor profile.  Hop bitterness, flavor, malt flavors, alcohol content and fermentation byproducts, such as diacetyl, should be appropriate to the base beer  and harmonious and balanced with the distinctive fruit flavors present. 

Mouthfeel: Mouthfeel may vary depending on the base beer selected and as appropriate to that base beer.  Body and carbonation levels should be appropriate to the base beer style being presented.

Overall Impression: A harmonious marriage of fruit and beer.

Comments: Overall balance is the key to presenting a well-made fruit beer.  The fruit should complement the original style and not overwhelm it. The brewer should recognize that some combinations of base beer styles and fruits work well together while others do not make for harmonious combinations.  The entrant must specify the underlying beer style as well as the type of fruit(s) used.  If the base beer is a classic style, the original style should come through in aroma and flavor. Judges should remember that many fruits dry out classic styles.

Vital Statistics:   OG, FG, IBUs, SRM and ABV will vary depending on the underlying base beer.

Commercial Examples: Oxford Raspberry Wheat, Oregon Blackberry Porter, Pyramid Apricot Ale, Rogue 'n' Berry, Brimstone Blueberry Wheat, Oaken Barrel Raspberry Wheat.


22. SPICE/HERB/VEGETABLE BEER

Aroma: The character of the particular spices, herbs and/or vegetables (SHV) should be distinctive in the aroma.  Overall the aroma should be a balanced combination of malt, hops and the featured SHV(s) as appropriate to the specific type of beer being presented.  If the base beer is an ale then general fruitiness and other fermentation byproducts such as diacetyl may be present as appropriate for the warmer fermentation.  If the base beer is a lager, then overall less fermentation byproducts would be appropriate.  Some malt aroma preferable, especially in dark styles; hop aroma absent or balanced with the SHVs used, depending on style.  The overall aroma should be balanced and harmonious.

Appearance: Appearance should be appropriate to the base beer being presented and will vary depending on the base beer.  For lighter beers with spices, herbs or vegetables that exhibit distinctive colors, the colors should be noticeable.

Flavor: The character of the particular SHV(s) should be distinctive in the flavor profile.  Hop bitterness, flavor, malt flavors, alcohol content, and fermentation byproducts, such as diacetyl, should be appropriate to the base beer  and harmonious and balanced with the distinctive SHV flavors present. 

Mouthfeel: Mouthfeel may vary depending on the base beer selected and as appropriate to that base beer.  Body and carbonation levels should be appropriate to the base beer style being presented.

Overall Impression: A harmonious marriage of spices, herbs and/or vegetables and beer.

Comments: Overall balance is the key to presenting a well-made spice, herb or vegetable (SHV) beer.  The SHV should complement the original style and not overwhelm it.  The brewer should recognize that some combinations of base beer styles and SHVs work well together while others do not make for harmonious combinations.  The entrant must specify the underlying beer style as well as the type of SHV(s) used.  If the base beer is a classic style, the original style should come through in aroma and flavor. Additionally, whenever multiple spices, herbs or vegetables are used each should be distinctive in their own way.

Vital Statistics:  OG, FG, IBUs, SRM and ABV will vary depending on the underlying base beer.

Commercial Examples: Harpoon Winter Warmer, Ed's Cave Creek Chili Beer, Buffalo Bill's Pumpkin Ale, Anchor Our Special Ale, Wild Onion Pumpkin Ale.


23. SMOKE-FLAVORED BEER


23A. Classic Rauchbier

Aroma: Smoky aroma may range from faint to assertive.  Some malt should be evident in the low- to moderately-smoked examples.  Note that the smoke character can vary even among beechwood-smoked malts.  Hop aroma should be negligible to very low.  This beer is a lager;  there should be no diacetyl or fruity aromas.  The malt character from the underlying Maerzen/Oktoberfest style should be evident.

Appearance: This should be a very clear beer, with a rich creamy head.  The color should be amber, copper to dark brown.

Flavor: Sweetish, maltiness from the underlying Maerzen/Oktoberfest style of beer with smoke flavors ranging from low to high, but balanced with the malt and hop bitterness.  The smoke flavor from beechwood kilning tends to be somewhat drier and neutral in character, although it can vary among maltsters, blending well with the sweetness of the malt.  This beer will exhibit low to medium hop bitterness, low to no hop flavor, and the clean characteristics of a lager with no fruitiness or diacetyl. 

Mouthfeel: Medium body with a good, medium level of carbonation.  Smooth finish due to lagering.

Overall Impression: Maerzen/Oktoberfest-style (see Oktoberfest) beer with a sweet, smoky aroma and flavor.

History: In the tradition of the Franconian region of Germany, a Maerzen/Oktoberfest style of beer made with malts kilned over moist beechwood log embers, imparting a smoky flavor and aroma to the beer.  This beer is indigenous to Bamberg, Germany.

Comments: Examples of other smoked beer styles are available in Germany, such as the Bocks, Helles and Vienna-like beers such as Spezial Lager. Brewers entering these styles should use Other Smoked Beers as the entry category.

Ingredients: Because of the unique flavored rendered to malts by various smoking materials, beechwood-kilned, not malts smoked with peat, hickory or other woods, should make up 5-50% of the malt bill. German or Czech hops.

Vital Statistics:                  OG: 1.050-1.064

IBUs: 20-30                         FG: 1.012-1.016

SRM: 7-16                        ABV: 4.8-6.5%

Commercial Examples: Schlenkerla Rauchbier, Kaiserdom Rauchbier.


23B. Other Smoked Beer

Aroma: The aroma should be a balance between the expected aroma of the base beer (e.g., robust porter) and the smokiness imparted by the use of smoked malts.  Smokiness may vary from low to assertive; however, balance in the overall presentation is the key to well-made examples.

Appearance: Varies with the base beer style.

Flavor: As with aroma, there should be a balance between smokiness and the expected flavor characteristics of the base beer style.  Smokiness may vary from low to assertive.  Smoky flavors may range from woodsy to slightly bacony depending on the type of malts used. 

Mouthfeel: Varies with the base beer style.

Overall Impression: This is any beer that is exhibiting smoke as a principle flavor and aroma characteristic other than the Bamberg-style Rauchbier.  Balance in the use of smoke, hops and malt character is exhibited by the better examples.  If this beer is based on a classic style (e.g., smoked robust porter), then the specific classic style (e.g., robust porter) must be identified.  In this case the beer will be judged on its merits as the classic style and how well that smoke flavor and aroma integrate with the beer and are exhibited.

Comments: The process of using smoked malts more recently has been adapted to other styles, notably porter and Scotch ales.

Ingredients: Different materials used to smoke malt result in unique flavor and aroma characteristics.  Beechwood-, peat- or other hardwood (alder and fruitwoods suggested) smoked malts may be used.  Hickory wood often results in a bacon/spare-ribs flavor and aroma, whereas alder wood smoked malt results in a smoked salmon taste. Evergreen wood should never be used since it adds a medicine-like, piney flavor to the malt.

Vital Statistics: Varies with the base beer style.

Commercial Examples: Vermont Pub and Brewery's Smoked Porter, Otter Creek Hickory-Switched Smoked Amber, Adelscott Peat Smoked Ale, Alaskan Smoked Porter, Spezial Lager.


AHA Competitions for Next Year

The AHA competition list for club only competitions from their web-site for 2002 is given below. For more information contact their web-site.


Blast from the Past ... 5 Years ago in 'Ye Olde Brew News'

From the December 1996 newsletter ....

You Know your a Homebrewer if...

IF you ever tried to improve a Budweiser by stirring in a crumpled hop pellet.

IF you have a hose adapter permanently attached to your kitchen faucet.

IF you wanted to name the puppy "Fuggles".

IF you have more than 10 gallons of beer in your home right now.

IF you can't remember the last time you popped open a flip-top beer can.

IF you have ever gone to a redemption center to buy bottles.

If walking across the kitchen floor sounds like Velcro.

Zymurgy - Fall 1995


Next Month's Competition

Next month's competition is Scottish Ales, BJCP category 5. This is an AHA club only competition.

5. SCOTTISH ALES


5A. Light 60/-

Aroma: Malt is evident; some examples have a low level of hop aroma. Fruitiness low to none. A very faint smoky and/or toasty/roasty characteristic sometimes present. May have some diacetyl.

Appearance: Amber to dark brown. Draught examples often have a creamy, long-lasting head.

Flavor: Malt-dominated flavor, with subdued esters and just enough hop bitterness to prevent the beer from being cloyingly sweet. A very slight toasty, roasty and/or chocolate-like character is sometimes present.  Caramel flavor from crystal malt medium to none.  May have some diacetyl.

Mouthfeel: Creamy, with low carbonation. Body is medium-light, but full for the gravity.

Overall Impression: Cleanly malty, with perhaps a faint touch of smoke and few esters.

History: More recent commercial interpretations from Scotland have begun to drift towards English bitter in terms of bitterness, balance, attenuation, esters and dry-hopping.  These guidelines don't account for these recent commercial examples which would more accurately be described as bitters.  Traditionally, these beers were dispensed via pumps, which forced air into the headspace of the cask, thus forcing the beer out. These air-powered systems are referred to as "tall fonts."  The "light" name associated with this style refers to the gravity rather than the color.

Comments: Though similar in gravity to ordinary bitter, the malt-hop balance is decidedly to the malt side. Long, cool fermentation leads to clean malt character (which may include some faint peat or smoke character). Note that the smoky character can be due to the yeast as often as to smoked or peat-kilned malt.  Strongly smoky beers should be entered in the Smoked Beer category rather than here.

Ingredients: Scottish or English pale malt with small proportions of roasted barley, crystal or chocolate malt. English hops. Clean, relatively un-attenuative ale yeast.

Vital Statistics:                  OG: 1.030-1.034

IBUs: 9-15                           FG: 1.010-1.013

SRM: 12-34                      ABV: 2.5-3.3%

Commercial Examples: Belhaven 60/-, Caledonian 60/-, Maclay 60/- Light, Highland Dark Light (HDL).


5B. Heavy 70/-

Aroma: Malt is evident; some examples have a low level of hop aroma. Fruitiness is low to none with a mild smoky character and/or toasty/roasty aroma, which is sometimes present.  May have some diacetyl.

Appearance: Amber to dark brown; draught examples often have a creamy, long-lasting head.

Flavor: Malt-dominated flavor, with subdued esters and just enough hop bitterness to prevent the beer from being cloyingly sweet. A very slight toasty/roasty or chocolate-like character is sometimes present.  Caramel flavor from crystal malt medium to none.  May have some diacetyl.

Mouthfeel: Creamy, with low carbonation. Body is medium to medium-light.

Overall Impression: Cleanly malty, with perhaps a faint touch of smoke and few esters.

History: More recent commercial interpretations from Scotland have begun to drift towards English bitter in terms of bitterness, balance, attenuation, esters and dry-hopping.  These guidelines don't account for these recent commercial examples which would more accurately be described as bitters.  Traditionally, these beers were dispensed via pumps, which forced air into the headspace of the cask, thus forcing the beer out. These air-powered systems are referred to as "tall fonts."

Comments: Though similar in gravity to special bitter, the malt-hop balance is decidedly to the malt side. Long, cool fermentation leads to clean malt character (which may include some faint peat or smoke character). Note that the smoky character can be due to the yeast as often as to smoked or peat-kilned malt.  Strongly smoky beers should be entered in the Smoked Beer category instead.

Ingredients: Scottish or English pale malt with small proportions of roasted barley, crystal or chocolate malt. English hops. Clean, relatively un-attenuative ale yeast.

Vital Statistics:                  OG: 1.034-1.040

IBUs: 10-25                         FG: 1.011-1.015

SRM: 10-19                      ABV: 3.2-3.9%

Commercial Examples: Orkney Raven Ale, Greenmantle Ale, Borve Heavy Ale, Waverly Ale 70/-, Highland Heavy, Belhaven 70/-, Caledonian 70/-,Maclay 70/-, McEwans 70/- (also sold as Younger's Scotch Ale and Tartan Special).


5C. Export 80/-

Aroma: Malt is evident; some examples have a low level of hop aroma. Fruitiness is low to none. A mild smoky and/or toasty/roasty character is sometimes present. May have some diacetyl.

Appearance: Amber to dark brown. Draught examples often have a creamy, long-lasting head.

Flavor: Malt-dominated flavor, with subdued esters and just enough hop bitterness to prevent the beer from being cloyingly sweet. A very slight toasty/roasty and/or chocolate-like character is sometimes present.  Caramel flavor from crystal malt medium to none.   May have some diacetyl.

Mouthfeel: Creamy, with low carbonation. Body is medium to medium-full.

Overall Impression: Cleanly malty, with perhaps a faint touch of smoke and few esters.

History: More recent commercial interpretations from Scotland have begun to drift towards English bitter in terms of bitterness, balance, attenuation, esters and dry-hopping.  These guidelines don't account for these recent commercial examples which would more accurately be described as bitters.  Traditionally, these beers were dispensed via pumps, which forced air into the headspace of the cask, thus forcing the beer out. These air-powered systems are referred to as "tall fonts."

Comments: Though similar in gravity to strong bitter, the malt-hop balance is decidedly to the malt side.  Long, cool fermentation leads to clean malt character (which may include some faint peat or smoke character). Note that the smoky character can be due to the yeast as often as to smoked or peat-kilned malt.  Strongly smoky beers should be entered in the Smoked Beer category instead.  It is important to note that while the IBUs on some of these beers can be rather high, the low attenuation and solid maltiness results in a balance that is still even at best and more than likely towards malt.

Ingredients: Scottish or English pale malt with small proportions of roasted barley, crystal or chocolate malt. English hops. Clean, relatively un-attenuative ale yeast.

Vital Statistics:                  OG: 1.040-1.050

IBUs: 15-36                         FG: 1.013-1.017

SRM: 10-19                      ABV: 3.9 to 4.9%

Commercial Examples: Orkney Dark Island, Harviestown 80/-, Sherlock's Home Piper's Pride, Greenmantle 80/- Export, Arrol's 80/-, Highland Severe, Younger's No. 3, McEwan's 80/- (despite the "India Pale Ale" on the label), Arrol's 80/-, Belhaven 80/- (Belhaven Scottish Ale in the US), Caledonian 80/- Export Ale (Caledonian Amber Ale in the US), Maclay Scotch Ale, Maclay 80/- Export (Maclay 80 Shilling Export Ale in the US).



beergalss Beer Events, Meetings & Competitions
Gabrielle Palmer
bitter

smile2 Fermental Funny smile

contribution from Dave Peters

Bad Santa

from Theresa Young

DRINKING TOAST
Here's to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one.
A pretty girl and an honest one.
A cold beer - and another one!

contribution from Kathy Loftus

Humorous Facts

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it!)

If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb. (Now that's more like it!)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (Still not over that pig thing!)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. (Hmmmmm.....)

A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated. (From drinking little bottles of...?) (Did the gov't pay for this research??)

Polar bears are left handed. (Who knew....?,Who cares!)

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.

A cockroach will live nine days without it's head, before it starves to death.

Butterflies taste with their feet. (Oh, jeez!)

Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than it's brain. (I know some people like that.)

Starfish don't have brains. (I know some people like that too!)

Remember, when someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown. BUT, it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and smack the jerk upside the head.

Finally, another contribution from Theresa Young...

Two men were very drunk after their college reunion and wanted to leave the hotel. One of them stopped someone and asked, "Look, pops, how do ya get out of here?"

The porter pointed along the passage. "Turn right at the next passage and go down two steps and you'll be in the main hall."

The two men staggered on together, but turned left instead of right, and fell down the elevator shaft to the basement.

As they sorted themselves out, the second one rolled over. "Look, pal, if that fella thinks I'm going down the other step, he's crazy!"

Ye Olde Brew News
published by the F.O.R.D. Homebrew Club
Editor:
Tony Tantillo

Contributors:
Howard Klix
Gabrielle Palmer
David Peters
Theresa Young
Kathy Loftus
Tony Tantillo

Club Officers:
Doug Geiss, President
Howard Klix, Sr, Vice President
Howard Klix Jr., Secretary
Chris Frey, Treasurer
Tony Tantillo, Newsletter Editor
Gabrielle Palmer, Webmaster
Sue Merritt, Photographer/Historian/Beer Mooch
Kathy Loftus, Photographer
Mike Arend, Librarian
Jim Rice & Tyler Barber, Special Events Coordinators
Tyler Barber, Equipment Manager
Rich Byrnes, Business Manager

F.O.R.D. is a private, non-profit organization of homebrewers. The main goal of this club is to promote awareness and appreciation of the quality and variety of beer; to share information regarding technique, equipment and skill required to brew quality homemade beer; and to encourage responsible use of beer as an alcohol-containing beverage.
Howard Klix Jr.
24737 Cushing Ave
Eastpointe, MI 48021

Phone: 810-779-1445
Email: raistlin01@home.com

Visit our website at: http://www.be.ford.com/brewers/
or external to Ford at: http://hbd.org/ford/

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